Friday, June 29, 2007

Across the Universe

"Music is the only thing thats makes sense it loud enough and it blocks out the demons."

~ Jo-Jo, Across the Universe

The movie's due out in September, but I'll probably just wait to rent it. The previews I've seen look ok-entertaining.

It would be cruel to call "Across the Universe" a two hour music video because it tries so hard to be more than that, but it wouldn't be entirely inaccurate either. The movie can be summed up as a series of punctuated scenes and characters each represented by a Beatles song and strung together by a boilerplate love story.

Of course, these criteria don't preclude the movie from being a true gem...

...In the best of cases, a movie allows music to transcend its established history. In the worst of cases, music is exploited for its most superficial meaning. Sadly, too often, Across the Universe is guilty of the latter.

~from a commentor at who apparently screened the movie

I like The Beatles music. And I often don't understand the meaning of many of their lyrics. But I liked the first quote from the trailer and the preview made me want to see the movie, so I'm sharing.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007


"Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."

~All At Once, The Fray

Friday, June 22, 2007

James Taylor and Heaven (and Hebrews, again!)

Catch of the Day~ June 22, 2007

"Eternity (or Carolina, whichever comes first)" by John Fischer

This morning I jogged to James Taylor's "Carolina In My Mind" and couldn't help thinking of eternity. I think it was the "holy host of others standing 'round me" line that reminded me of the great cloud of witnesses in Hebrews 12:1. At any rate, my crazy mind is always making these kinds of connections between the sacred and secular. (Actually I'm no longer aware of much of a difference between the two; it's all gotten pretty holy to me.) Not that we live our lives only for eternity, or that we become so other-worldly we are of no use to this world, but the fact that as believers we do have a life #2 waiting for us in eternity should have some effect on how we live today. So for inspiration today along these lines, we will borrow from the apostle Paul, from whoever wrote Hebrews if it wasn't Paul, from Peter and from James (Taylor, that is). And the theme is sort of like living with eternity (or Carolina, whichever comes first) in your mind.

In my mind I'm goin' to Carolina
Can't you see the sunshine
Can't you just feel the moonshine
Maybe just like a friend of mine
It hit me from behind
Yes I'm goin' to Carolina in my mind

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. (2 Corinthians 4:17)

There ain't no doubt in no one's mind
That love's the finest thing around
Whisper something warm and kind

The end of all things is near... [so] love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:7-8)

Since everything will be destroyed... what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming. That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat.

But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, the home of righteousness. (2 Peter 3:11-13)

And hey babe the sky's on fire
I'm dyin' ain't I... goin' to Carolina in my mind

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (Hebrews 12:1)

With a holy host of others standing 'round me
Still I'm on the dark side of the moon
And it seems like it goes on like this forever
You must forgive me
If I'm up and gone to Carolina in my mind

Wednesday, June 20, 2007



Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Could We Get A Joke In Here, Please

Not making fun of anyone here, just sharing in the simple pleasure of a good chuckle. And we sure can use one of those around here. Daisy shares some of her stories "from the field." Thanks for the distraction, Daisy!

*One of my autistic students was in trouble and was sent into the hallway for 2 minutes after smarting off several times. After the 2 minutes I went to talk to him. Normally if you mention something about hurting your feelings he feels really bad and apologizes. Below is the dialogue between teacher "t" and student "s".

t: "If you're ready to behave like a 6th grader you may come back in."
s: "I'm sorry I got mad at you."
t: "It's not nice to yell at me."
s: "Well, it's not nice that you make me do my math."
t: "Sometimes we have to do things we don't like to do. It really hurt my feelings when you yelled at me."
s: "I'm sorry your feelings got involved."

yep - that was a 6th grader - sounds like something a typical guy says!

*The same student (on a different day) held his calculator to his mouth and started whispering. I tried to nonchalantly get closer so I could overhear what he was saying. "Breaker breaker, over and out. . . breaker breaker, do you copy? over and out . . . " He then started to look around the room to see if anyone was watching him. He then started yelling (into his calculator), "SECURITY - SECURITY - there's a fire in the room. SECURITY!" I then acted really stunned asking where the fire is located and he told me it was just a joke. I told him fires aren't something to joke about and he put the calculator back up to his mouth and said "SECURITY - SECURITY - could we get a joke in here?"

For me it's a laugh, for some of you just a chuckle. I guess maybe you just have to work "in the field" to really get it. Cmon, could we get a joke in here?!

Assurance of Justification

Stained and dirty in the eyes of a king
Tattered and tarnished, will I ever be clean?

But He is spotless and holy
And I could never compare
In the sinful garments I wear

But Jesus stepped between the Father and me
Now the way that He sees His Son,
I’m justified, oh it’s just as I had never
No never, sinned before
I’m justified, because Jesus died
And now God will see my sins no more
Oh I’m justified

Crimes committed and the verdict, guilty as charged
And the final judgment is eternal separation from God
Oh but Jesus stepped between the Father and me
I am pardoned ‘cause he took my guilty plea

I’m justified, oh it’s just as I had never
No never sinned before
I’m justified, because Jesus died
And now God will see my sins no more
Oh I’m justified

~ Justified, According to John A2J

To listen, click on the link above then click on the B2 button at the bottom of the jukebox.

This song has always brought me peace, even if fleeting. There's just something about feeling justified, that makes me also feel way too bold.

I was reading scripture earlier about being justified. The word itself just makes me feel like I might come across to a non-Christian as being too haughty. I fear misinterpretation. It does seem that if we are too sure of ourselves that we are arrogant. I just have to stress that I am justified through Christ. But it's not just me, it's every single one of us who can have that blessed assurance.

Assurance. See, I am sure. That Jesus is mine. Heir of salvation, purchase of God, born of His Spirit, washed in His blood. How could I ever not be sure? I am sure of Him, I am not sure of myself. THAT'S the way it's suppose to be. I cannot rely on myself. We must rely on Jesus' sacrifice and God's grace.

That's all I can do.

Once Saved Always Saved? Am I Even Forgiven?

Hebrews 8:12

“For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." NIV

Hebrews 10:26, 27

NIV “If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, 27but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God.”

NLT 26 Dear friends, if we deliberately continue sinning after we have received knowledge of the truth, there is no longer any sacrifice that will cover these sins. 27 There is only the terrible expectation of God’s judgment and the raging fire that will consume his enemies.

THE MESSAGE 26-27, 31 If we give up and turn our backs on all we've learned, all we've been given, all the truth we now know, we repudiate Christ's sacrifice and are left on our own to face the Judgment—and a mighty fierce judgment it will be!...God has warned us that he'll hold us to account and make us pay. He was quite explicit: "Vengeance is mine, and I won't overlook a thing" and "God will judge his people." Nobody's getting by with anything,
believe me.

Every time we sin, we turn our backs on Christ and the sacrifice he made for us. All of us sin, all of the time. So is there really no hope for any of us?

And then there's Hebrews 9 stuff. Facing judgment and giving an account. Why?...if our sins are "remembered no more" and we are justified by grace, in faith, and by and in Christ? I just don't get all the rehashing of the whole mess of sin that is forgiven.

If we can never be good enough or do enough good, and I believe there is no to-do list of obligations to be met in order to be saved, then maybe we can never understand enough either. We walk by faith and not by sight. There is no humanly-understood rhyme or reason except for believing, trusting, and having faith.

To jDR: Maybe I really was never saved. Maybe I’m not.

Unfailing Love

"When those who represent the unconditional love of God start laying down conditions for acceptance, love and understanding, where are the rest of us going to go? We need to come alongside each other and help -- no questions asked -- not run our spiritual Geiger counters up and down everybody's faith. " ~ John Fischer

There's a fine line between rebuking/redirecting/holding accountable and abandoning or shunning someone. Or even just disregarding them/their thoughts and feelings. Dismissing them. We must be careful not to exclude others or separate ourselves from others.

There's more, but I can't get it into words right now. It's just something to ponder. And pray about. Wait, I have a few words.

DiAn: You are right. It's a lie, IMO. I do not believe that God turns His back on you because you once willfully turned your back on Him. You have repented. You have made the wrong right. He is your heavenly Father and He is standing right there beside you. I question some scripture--not the validity--but my understanding of it on some of this and have discussed it recently with some others. I still don't have a
good grasp, but I must have faith that because I KNOW my Father, my God, my Savior, that He truly does know me and my heart. He won't turn His back on me. He is Almighty, He is Omnipotent, He is Sovereign. He is not like me. He is not human or unfaithful. He won't turn His back on us. Why? Here you go, DiAn. Because of Jesus. Because Jesus paid the price for us. Jesus is our arbitrator! We talk about the Old Testament wrath of God and the punishment and God speaking to His people. So scary and so hard to fathom that the God we love could possibly ever love us. He sent Jesus so we would never again have to doubt that there IS a way, a truth, a light. We have that hope.

More later. It's the Hebrews stuff I need to address. In the meantime, anybody else have any thoughts?

Monday, June 18, 2007

Jars of Clay 1998

An article by John Fischer who indirectly mentored Jars of Clay before they were, was so very interesting to me, a JoC fan. Here's an excerpt, but the article is full of so many points to ponder.

Guest spots on the Late Show With David Letterman, MTV videos, a Coke commercial, a stint fronting for Sting, a song for the soundtrack of the movie Hard Rain, and features in Billboard magazine, Rolling Stone, Spin, and Details have proven that thoughtful lyrics, carefully crafted and creatively presented from a Christian perspective can gain a hearing in the wider culture...

We were outdoors at the Starplex amphitheater in Dallas and Jars of Clay was closing out a four-hour show presented by a local alternative rock station as a celebration of the station's twenty-fifth anniversary. The tattooed, body-pierced audience was not sure what to expect of this new group. From a darkened stage two candelabra were lit and suddenly three slight figures were seen emerging from the fog, two of them tearing into their acoustic guitars with a vengeance, and the other preparing to arch his first words to a waiting, prove-it-to-me crowd: "Arms nailed down, are you telling me something?" To many who would probably never go there and would certainly never call it that--church had begun.

Read John Fischer's article here.

Faith: A Very Thin Line (but a lifeline nonetheless)

I can see how it could happen. A preacher [talking with someone] whose comment reminds him of a verse: Psalm 27:13, I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. The preacher is trying to he emphasizes that David is expecting to get relief [soon] from whatever bind he was in, not in some far off by and by: 'in the land of the living,' he stresses. And then he says, 'Imagine what David's life would have been had he not known the Lord? He would have been depressed; he would have been discouraged...' and on and on, 'but look at David and look at what a great man he became, and the same thing can happen to you if you believe.'

And as I saw this, my little 'wait a minute' truth flag went up. Wait a minute, I thought, David was depressed. He was discouraged. He committed devastating sins;
He bore huge consequences for those sins. In fact, through his poetry, we know more about the spiritual/emotional makeup of this man than we do of some of our best friends, and we know that sometimes he felt completely abandoned by the Lord, and sometimes his prayers seemed to go nowhere, and all of this happened while he knew the Lord! I wanted to scream..."

~ Catch of the Day, June 18, 2007, John Fischer

And sometimes I want to scream!

I have two points.
1. The author of this Catch of the Day makes 1. in his conclusion: "Imagine what David's life would have been like had he not known the Lord, is NOT the point. The point is: David knew the Lord and his life was full of struggle and pain. So take heart. YOUR STRUGGLE IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD OR THE END OF YOUR FAITH." (The ALL caps is my version of his last statement and I will expound on the end of my faith in another post sometime.)

2. "through his poetry, we know more about the spiritual/emotional makeup of this man than we do of some of our best friends, and we know that sometimes he felt completely abandoned by the Lord, and sometimes his prayers seemed to go nowhere, and all of this happened while he knew the Lord!"

Through my poetry, my writings, through all the emotional mess and ranges, you may know more about me. Maybe more than you want to know. But more. For anyone who cares, you need to hear the good and the bad, the sad and the mad, and yes, the completely immature and juvenile outbursts. And as I've said before, if you don't care or don't "need" to hear or know, well, you're reading the wrong blog. And, again, another post might touch on the subject of feeling abandoned by those you are closest to, sometimes even by your Christian family. And how God does send angels that you never expected.

Some Things I Blog

Sometimes I am immature, selfish, and juvenile. All parts of the whole. If you are going to know me, then know me. If you don't know me, know that there is more to me than this. In either case, know that everyone you know has an immature, selfish, juvenile side. We each have our own unique ways of letting it out. Some of us do a better job of containing it.......and then some of us blog.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Where's the OK Corral?

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and I'm going to give you 24 hours to get out."

"Nick Grindell" - The Western Code (1932) as quoted at

Emotions in Motion

Oh my, am I ever running the gamut. Whew! Surely this internal whirlwind is at least kickin up the metabolism. This heart-pounding is workin off all the Mello Yello maybe?

It's more painful to be strong sometimes than it is just to completely lose it. Turn up Chris Daughtry and scream! Or Chris Rice, James Blunt, or Blind Melon and just let the tears pour. An outsider looking in might then see excruciating pain, but it's the times when all appears well that the pain is just grinding away, eroding from the inside out. There's a lot to be said for letting it all out and being able to loosen the knot in your chest, clear out the cobwebs of your mind.

Love, pain, and the whole crazy thing. When will it ever be over? I am so done with it. I have let it go. I drive the long way around, I avoid certain restaurants at certain times, I turn down social events and friendly invitations for fear of running into the source, I arrive early or late and/or leave early or late so as not to invite trouble.

This town just ain't big enough.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Makes Me Wanna Dance!

  • I've got myself in a masochistic hold
  • Why don't you let go
  • Shake it off just to redirect my flow
  • Come on let's go
  • Sit up straight, I'm on a double date
  • I've gotta find my way into the light, heavy, middle weight
  • We don't stop rock around the clock
  • Motor mouthing off in front of every other road block
  • Come again and tell me what you're going through
  • Like a girl who only knew her child was due
  • Memories of everything, of lemon trees on mercury
  • Come to me with remedies from five or six of seven seas
  • You always took me with a smile when I was down
  • Memories of everything that blew through
  • Looking up into a reverse vertigo
  • What an undertow
  • Give it up another stubborn scorpio
  • Come on let's go
  • Sit up straight, I'm on a double date
  • I've gotta find my way into the light, heavy, middle weight
  • We don't stop rock around the clock
  • Motor mouthing off in front of every other road block
  • Come again and tell me what you're going through
  • Like a girl who only knew her child was due
  • To the moon she gave another good review
  • Turn around and look at me, it's really really you

~ On Mercury, Red Hot Chili Peppers

Can't concentrate at work. Listening to the "death and dying" CD all day today. I love it all. Even the one about the awful, dreadful snake. DiAn and I cried to one this morning. Hey, there's alot to be said for the cleansing cry! The CD does cheer up a bit at the end with this one. I really needed this and some crazy dancin! The dancing will have to wait until later. Memories of everything that blew through...

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

A Change Will Do You Good

A minor detail for you, a big deal for me.

A friend and I have been talking alot lately about how someone can do something that causes major devastation to you or in your life, but that person may not even have any idea that they've wreaked such havoc. I'm in the midst of experiencing this and I give the destroyer big-time credit for having absolutely no clue. (Sad, I know.)

Now today, something hurtful was taken away. Different person, same subject, but still, someone has helped me in a way that he would never understand and that he might not even realize. Then again, maybe he did...thus, the change. Maybe it's just a coincidence. In any case, I am grateful. When you ease someone's burden even if you don't understand their misery or you don't see how you could've possibly helped, it's still a very good thing.

(I wish I could find my passport!)

Wednesday, June 06, 2007


Does she read my blog? No. Does she know what a blog is? No.
Still, it is her birthday and I do wish her a happy

Monday, June 04, 2007

Something's Gotta Give

"I just need something good to happen, I need a sign that things are going to change. I need a reason to go on. I need some hope! And in the absence of hope, I need to stay in bed and feel like I'm going to die today."

Meredith ~ Grey's Anatomy

Been there, done that. Try hard to stay away from there, doing that. Sometimes I am weak.

Most of you just don't get it. Be ever so thankful.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

And..."Rescue Is Coming"

There’s a darkness in my skin
My cover’s wearing thin, I believe
I’d love to start again, go back to innocent
And never leave

Don’t give up now
A break in the clouds
We could be found
There’s nothing wrong with me
It’s just that I believe things could get better
And there’s nothing wrong with love
I think it’s just enough to believe

Rescue is coming
Rescue is coming
Rescue is coming
Rescue is coming

And there’s nothing wrong with you
And nothing left to do
But believe something bigger
And there’s nothing wrong with love
I know it’s just enough to believe

Don’t give up now
A break in the clouds
We will be found
Rescue is coming now

~ David Crowder

More here. Thanks, jDR.

Rescue Me

"You have a knack for saving my life. I think I have a superhero stalker."

MJ ~ Spider-Man

From the original Spider-Man, I believe. Ranks as the best, IMO, right up there with Spider-Man 2. Spider-Man 3 was ho hum--again, IMO.

Oddly enough, I have had both a stalker of sorts (and a prowler/peeping tom) and my own personal superhero! Oh, the adventure. The superhero, I welcomed. The others, not so much.

Sharkboy, take me away!

Mad, passionate, extraordinary. The way it should be.

"Anything less than mad, passionate, extraordinary love is a waste of your time...There are too many mediocre things in life to deal with, and love shouldn't have to be one of them."

Frankie~Dream For An Insomniac

My Freak-Flag Flies High!

In People magazine, Drew Barrymore was asked, "Any beauty rules for dating?"

Her response: "The only fundamental rule for me is to just be yourself. Let your freak-flag fly, and if someone doesn't get you, move on."

I had a best friend who was just as freaky as I am and we even called one another "freak," "weirdo," "dork" and other terms of endearment. We seemed to really get each other and accepted each other's weirdness. We joked about it all the time. Had lots of fun. It was the best of friendships. I miss him.

Now he's moved on. The friendship isn't allowed, I guess. So be it. The freakin' weirdo!

Thanks, Daisy, for the People magazine scoop!