Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Give * Live * Love * Coke

The Real Thing.

My Coca-Cola commercial for the season.

(Again, not my original jingle, but I am a Coca-Cola fan.)

Sunday, December 24, 2006

"Dew Be Dew Be Dew"

Mountain Dew

Same Dew.
New View.

STILL can't hold a candle to Mello Yello.


I'm just saying.

Friday, December 22, 2006


You can spend your whole life building something from nothing
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway
You can chase a dream that seems so out of reach
and you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway

God is great, but sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray, it doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway, I do it anyway

This world's gone crazy and it's hard to believe
that tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway
You can love someone with all your heart, for all the right reasons,
and in a moment they can choose to walk away
Love him anyway

You can pour your soul out singing a song you believe in
that tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway, sing it anyway

God is great, but sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray, it doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway, I do it anyway.

Anyway~Martina McBride

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Feeling A Bit Belligerent

This is a location thing, I'm sure, you just had to be here this afternoon...and feeling silly, immature, and justified.

Got a good laugh from Lori’s holiday ditty “Puke, Puke Face” (to the tune of “Jingle Bells”). Now that’s bent, but funny! Wish I could post it all, but, well, just can't. Thanks for the laugh, LB. I’ll work on a ruthless ending to my “Don’t Lay Under the Christmas Tree With Anyone Else But Me.” Maybe something about the tree falling or catching on fire from burning my vanilla candles with someone else. Ruthless, you say,...I’ll have to think on that one.

These are sure to become classics! Distractions. :)

Sorry for the ugliness. It is just a phase, and maybe a stage in the process. Maybe it'll take the place of "hate" for me. I really don't think I can hate.

Broke Before It Bent

There you go. And that says it.

I'm dying, dying to wake up without you in my head again
Dying, dying to forget about you...

It's the same old story of love and glory that broke before it bent
I'm dying to live without you again.

Dying~Five For Fighting

Oh golly, that's just pitiful. And not nearly so much fun as dancing in the living room to FFF's Angels and Girlfriends.

I'm strong enough to bend. It's like conditioning, working up to it. Then "it" can break, but maybe you don't because you've prepared yourself. Hanson sings "Strong Enough to Break," and that really takes some doing to work yourself up to a break without a bend. Either way, there's preparedness.

Consideration is much appreciated. Much better than blatant disregard (borrowing that from you jDR.) This one is about me. It's my breakdown, I get to make the rules. If that means wait, then wait. Sometimes timing is everything.

Ah, getting feisty... and healing.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Not Ready To Make Nice

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting

I'm through with doubt
There's nothing left for me to figure out
I paid a price
and I'll keep paying

I'm not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still mad
and I don't have time
to go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if could
'cause I'm mad
I can't bring myself
to do what it is you think I should

I know you said
"Can't you just get over it"
It turned my whole world around...

Not Ready To Make Nice~ Dixie Chicks
It turned my whole world around. And I don't like it.
I can't just get over it.
Wish I could get mad, really mad, and stay mad for just a little while. Not long, just long enough.

I'm just not ready to make nice.

You can listen here: First verse and chorus anyway...The rest, well, I'm not in to the whole Natalie/George fiasco.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Living Dying

Sudden realization of the inevitable.

A nightmare. You wake up and it’s over.
Living a nightmare. It just keeps happening. Over and over and over.

A specific, situational, real-life nightmare just might be about to happen again. Already...again. Anticipation of the horror. I know the day, the time, the place, the pain. It's just around the corner. I can’t avoid it. I must live through it again. I can’t get out of it.

The only human who can stop it is the same one who will hand the torture to me on a silver platter with a big shiny bow. I can refuse it, but it won’t matter. The nightmare will have begun regardless. It will be just for me, especially for me. I will be forced to endure it. I will, unfortunately, live through it. Again. And how many more times before I’ve been given a chance to recover? It’s just not necessary, there is no good reason. Not right now.

I’m a fish in a waterless fishbowl. I can’t breathe, I can’t get out. Everyone is watching. How can I fake living while I’m dying before their eyes? Living dying. Neither process overcomes the other or comes to fruition. It’s an excruciating torment of living dying.

Oh, dear God, please.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Me and God :)

There ain't nothing that can't be done by
me and God
Ain't nobody come in between
me and God
One day we'll live together where the angels trod
me and God

...I am weak and he is strong
me and God
He forgives me when I'm wrong
me and God
He's the one I lean on when life gets hard
me and God

Artists: Josh Turner/Ralph Stanley

Country radio can be good. Haven't been listening to it much lately. Makes me cry or mad. Either way, not good. Tonight I braved it...heard Josh Turner and "Me and God" of all things. Yeah, me and God. Good.

No Longer Your Problem

I don't know if it's necessarily
the things you do
Maybe the things you say
Or maybe just the way you say it
It's true you sing a pretty song indeed
in a new way
You've said some things to me
But I'm not sure if you really mean it
Do you realize what you have done?
Do you think we have a problem?

You make me dance, you make me cry, you make me laugh
You make me shout, you make me smile, you make me mad
You make me sing, you make me think, you make me sad
You make me fall, you make me love, you make me mad

Do you realize what you have done?
Do you think we have a problem?

You Make Me Mad~ lyrics by Mac Powell, music by Third Day

Actions usually do speak louder than words, but sometimes words that are never said speak louder in those actions and in the things that you do say. Say what you mean, mean what you say. And if you don't, then don't. And don't act like it.

Saved, But Lost

Reading over my posts here and knowing me like I do with all the ups and downs :) , I can see where some might be thinking I'm a hypocrite. If the joy of the Lord is my strength, and it is; and through Christ all things are possible, and they are; and I truly believe there is God-planned purpose for me, and I do; then why all the glum, sad, negative whining here?

I don't know. Good question.

I'm not a faker. Things are not always good. God blessed me with this outlet, maybe (my blog). However, I don't want to mislead anyone. I'm not anywhere near perfect or good enough. I'm big-time flawed. I'm human. Being a Christian doesn't make everything easy, but it does give us hope. I can wallow and know that in the end, I win. We win.

My heart knows the joy of the Lord and the possibilities through Christ. Those are eternal. My heart cannot fake what is not eternal. I don't like feeling that I am just going through the motions with everyday human emotions and happenings, but sometimes I do have to rely on all my blessings, whether it be friends, songs, quotes, get me through the daggone long heart-wrenching day.

"All that is not eternal is eternally useless." ~C S Lewis
I get it. I believe it. But I mess it up.


Gradually, then suddenly. That's how it hits. You wake up one
morning afraid that you're going to live.

~from Prozac Nation

Monday, December 11, 2006

What If I'd Never Met You?


~ I wouldn’t have all these birthday surprises and now not know what to do with them.

~ I might never have heard the “men-do-and-be” concept. You and your insight!

~ I’d never have become adequately proficient on the piano/keyboard and learned to play by guitar chords!

~ I’d not have met Todd and Sam. Nor would I have thrown Barbie dolls in the front yard!

~ I might not have a Game Plan for rolling with the punches.

~ I’d more than likely not have made a best friend and lost the same best friend within a year.

~ I would NEVER have broken and entered! And in the windy, downpouring rain to boot!

~ I'd never have been in a gang. Or a band.

~ I’d probably have had a meltdown Labor Day weekend. (Oh wait, I did anyway, didn’t I!)

~ I would not have had a meltdown Labor Day weekend.

~ I’d not have dug through the McDonald’s toy freebies bin at St Vincent DePaul and Goodwill!

~ I’d not have a best friend this very day that I trust with my life—with my child’s life even.

~ I’d not have understood what you say about stars splitting and coming back together.

~ I'd have thought I was the only weird-in-a-good-way freak out there.

~ I would have forgotten that it really is my job to fight ignorance.

~ I’d weigh 123 instead of 103.

~ I’d have been really annoyed by the tennis ball call from the wall.

~ I would have died in your basement bedroom. Most certainly. God and you, what a team.

~ I would never have touched anyone else’s feet, other than my child’s. Ever.

~ I doubt I would ever have heard of Clem Snide. Or met another adult who likes Hanson.

~ I wouldn't have missed missing the Steelers beat the Browns.

~ I wouldn't have forgotten to record Little Big Town on Crossroads.

~ I might not have listened to hours of metal music Sat night/Sun morning. And I did that for why?! Oh yeah, good company.

~ I would never have known a superhero, nor been one.

Golly, such significance in a bunch of words. Meaningless events to most of you, but if you recognize yourself in one, you might understand the turning point. And maybe not. I do anyway. And this is my space.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Take It and Forget It

I've tripped again and things are starting to get interesting
Don't give me choices 'cause I can't decide
My mind is soaked in words, I've come to terms
with all my insecurities...

And dreamin' doesn't do no good
'cause I don't wanna lie
that I'm okay and I'm alright
I'd rather take it and forget it...

You're kinda cool, but I know better than to break the rules
of messin' with a lesson that I'll never learn
I'll go from bad to worse and later back to better
but I'll never better bridges that I'm bent to burn

And dreamin' doesn't do no good
'cause I don't wanna lie
that I'm okay and I'm alright
I'd rather take it and forget it

Consider This ~ Anna Nalick

Just forget it.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


...just breathe

Monday, December 04, 2006

LB (and Eyeleen): This One's For You!

Even more from Grey's Anatomy ...

"Intimacy is a four syllable word for, "Here's my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger, and enjoy."
"Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers, you just breath deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed but sometimes the pain gets you where you least expect it. Hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it and life always makes more."
"At the end of the day, there are some things you just can't help but talk about. Some things we just don't want to hear, and some things we say because we can't be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they're what you do. Some things you say cause there's no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves."
Dr. Derek Shepherd: So we're kissing but we're not dating?
Dr. Meredith Grey: I knew that was going to come up.
Dr. Derek Shepherd: Don't get me wrong: I like the kissing. I'm all for the kissing. More kissing, I say.
Dr. Meredith Grey: I have no idea what that was about.

Yeah, that just darn well speaks for itself!

Hope you all enjoyed these. Next time it'll be funny stuff. (I did watch about 14 episodes of "The Office" this weekend.) However, that last GA quote from Meredith and McDreamy was just dadgum hilarious! Good grief. I'm just saying~~

And to those who read and never comment here...I like your email and in-person comments, but don't be afraid here! Use your alias. Right, Diann Hanes?! ;)

Glorious Sadness

Spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
There's always some reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day

I need some distraction
Oh, beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
Let me be empty
oh, and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight

In the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark, cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you feel

You are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here

So tired of the straight line
and everywhere you turn
there're vultures and thieves at your back
The storm keeps on twisting
Keep building the lies
that you make up for all that you lack

Don't make no difference
escape one last time
It's easier to believe
in this sweet madness
oh, this glorious sadness
that brings me to my knees

You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

Angel ~ Sarah McLachlan

Sunday, December 03, 2006


Therefore encourage one another and build up each other, as indeed you are doing.
I Thessalonians 5:11

Dear God - A call, a note, and a handclasp from a friend are simple and seemingly insignificant. Yet, you inspire these gifts from people we have special affection for. These cherished acts of friendship nudge aside doubts about who we are when we feel low and encourage our hearts in a way that lifts our spirits.

December 3 from My Personal Daily Prayer Book

Thank you, God, for the friends you have given to me. True friends. Unconditionally.


You know who you are.

Friday, December 01, 2006

Worth Repeating


I'll be your mirror, reflect what you are
in case you don't know I'll be the wind,
the rain, and the sunset, the light on your door
to show that you're home
'Cause when you think the night has seen your mind
and inside you're twisted and unkind
Let me stand to show that you are blind
Please put down your hand, 'cause I see you

I find it hard to believe you don't know
the beauty you are, but if you don't
let me be your eyes, a hand to your darkness
so you won't feel afraid
'Cause when you think the night has seen your mind
and inside you're twisted and unkind
let me stand to show that you are blind
Please put down your hand, 'cause I see you

I'll be your mirror, reflect what you are

~Clem Snide (Don’t know if this group is the original artist or
writer, but it’s their version that I’ve heard and can’t get out of my

When you lose sight of yourself, when you feel like you’re flitting in the wind, God is right there to remind you who you are, to give you stability and to ground you. Sometimes the grounding is a welcome comfort--security. Sometimes it might be like clipping your wings, and you feel a little frustrated that you can’t just do whatever you want to do. We have to remember that we were created by God for God. He knows us. No matter how hard we might try to hide parts of ourselves from Him, He sees us. He sees the hurt and the bad, he sees the good and the joy. He can bless, he can heal, and he can reprimand. In any case, He can make things right. We have to be willing to acknowledge Him, and make life-changing commitments and sacrifices.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about God’s will for my life--the plans He has for me that I just can’t figure out right now. Something I read recently reminded me that if I am asking God for direction, but feel like I’m not getting answers or guidance, it could be that I don’t truly have Him in first place in my life. He’s right there, but I’m so caught up in my own stuff that I can’t connect with Him. I keep Him at a distance. I don’t intentionally push Him away, but I don’t intentionally acknowledge him in all ways.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

In ALL my ways. Everything. That’s something I need to work on. I’m glad God knows me and sees me. Even though he sees the ugly parts that disappoint Him, I’m still glad that I can’t hide from Him. There’s no need for me to have to try to explain myself or walk on eggshells. He gets me. He loves me anyway. And He won’t give up on me.